It's that time of the year. I look around and constantly hear and see "Jesus is the Reason for the Season." .. I have a different take on Christmas and the holiday season.
I consider myself spiritual but not religious. I got to a church that believes that we are all on a journey, we all take different paths, but we're taking it together. I love that idea. In my world, Jesus isnt exactly the reason for the season.
Christmas has always been my favorite holiday. The lights, decorations, getting a tree, gifts, the smells, everything. I tend to make it something it's never been for me. Christmas has not always been good to me. One year, when I was in junior high, after we'd opened our gifts, and had a great morning, I was in my room putting up my new posters, trying on my new clothes. My father came in, and told me he was leaving my mom. Parents, no matter how bad it is, dont tell your kids youre splitting up on Christmas.
One Christmas Eve my great grandmother died. Ok, actually, it was the night before my fathers announcement. Doesnt get much worse than that.
Another year, my father promised me the most awesome cowboy boots. They were done in cow skin, black and white. Thats all I wanted. He would take me to the store, for months to find the right size, make sure I still wanted them. Christmas Eve came. He gave me my gift. I opened it. A boot box! ...Inside though was another box. And another and another. Until it was a small jewelry box. Inside was a gold necklace with Jesus on a cross. Never in his life had my dad been to church or believed in God. And I was the same way...
Two years ago my baby sisters father went on a trip at this time. He never came home.
Christmas, hasnt always been good to me. But I still continue to try. Because what Christmas is to me, isnt Jesus or religion or church.
Its family. Its the one time of year I know ill be with my mom and sisters and niece, and my Bumble Bea. Its opening our stockings every year. Its knowing that there will be a box of sees candy that well pass around as we open gifts. That once were done my mom will make everyone waffles. Its going to my moms every year and decorating her tree. Hearing the stories of where each ornament came from. She has ornaments from before I was born. Its knowing that there are specific gifts Ill get from my mom each year. Christmas to me is about finding that perfect gift for the people in my life. Its about flavors of food that you can only get this time of year. Christmas is about staying in bed during the cold weather. Every year Bea and I take a night and we watch Rudolph and Frosty and the Grinch while eating pizza and wrapping gifts. Its about loading up my car with those gifts and making the 6 hour drive to my moms. Spending a week or two watching my niece while shes out of school.
These past few months have been especially hard on our family. But I know that come Christmas morning, all of that will be set aside. Because Family and Love are the true reasons for this season. ..at least in my world!
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